After a long time, I write an article instead of a book review because I want to talk about it. I was reading a newspaper, and suddenly I saw news with the headline of 15 years old boy who attempted suicide because his father refused to buy a bike. What the hell is going on with these kids? Do they ever think about the consequences of their stupid decisions? I am sure now his father lives in guilt or regret for the rest of his life. Losing a child is not easy, and it never will be.
But this kind of incident left a long-lasting impact on other people's lives as well. I clearly don't understand the thought process of kids these days. They just want to show off in front of their friends or crush. They want to make an impression, and they forget all the sacrifices their parents made for them. Well, I don't blame kids for everything because I know that it was their parent's fault somewhere.
"The goal as a parent is to help your child feel competent and confident, and; to help her develop a sense of passion and purpose." - Susan Stiffelman.
Parents fulfill each and every demand of their children. For example, I am sure you all notice whenever a kid starts crying, their parents give them a smartphone to play games, so they shut the fuck up, and if you are a parent, then you know what I'm talking about. A study shows that 75 percent of kids admit that they use the mobile phone after the lights go out, and their parents are clueless about it. But have you ever realized that your temporary solution gives you a permanent problem?
Both parents work in today's hectic life, and they don't have time for their children. They believe a good school gives them a good education, and they are right but do they ever think about good manners or moral values. They forgot that parents are the first teacher and home is the best school for children to learn and understand things. Being independent is not bad, but what's the meaning of all that money or luxury if you don't spend quality time with your family. Another study tells that kids who don't receive affection can suffer from chronic stress, disturbing their focus, memory, and learning capacity.
I know many parents who don't scold or stop their kids when they do something wrong & hurt other people's feelings. I believe everyone learns from their own mistakes but only teaches them the difference between right or wrong. Otherwise, you would not expect anything from them, not even respect and gratitude for you. People have a fixed mindset that if their kid achieves good grades in school, they will do a great job as a parent.
The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. At around 18 months, kids are starting to accept courtesy. Help your child think about other people's feelings. At the age of 3-4, teach them to be kind and some table etiquette. We all know that one impolite kid who interrupts all the time and their parents don't even bother with a second, and it's awful and annoying because of this behavior. People question your parenting, and trust me, no one likes your kid. The best part is no one is going to tell you because it will hurt your feelings & probably it's not their job; after all, it's your kid. But the good news is that 5 to 6 years old have the ability to wait for their turn to talk. You just have to teach this thing to your children. I am sure you can do that, dear parent. After all, good manners cost you nothing.
Maybe you think that your kid's stubborn behavior is normal, but it's not. It costs you sooner or later in many ways. So try to spend time with your kids, teach them good manners, tell them about right or wrong, play with them and try to avoid using the mobile phone in front of them as much as you can. The kids have a curiosity to know everything, so don't avoid their questions. Instead of saying go watch cartoons or play games on a smartphone, answer their question always. Build a healthy relationship so they can share everything with you without any hesitation and, most importantly, don't fulfill their unnecessary demands. If they cry to let them cry & once they understand that crying isn't gonna helpful, they will stop eventually. Tell them that they got only that stuff necessary or important at their age & stick to it.
Keep things clear and simple for you and your children. Allowing your child to see you trying something new may inspire her to do the same. It's your responsibility to bring up your kids with good manners, so in the future, they become responsible citizens and take care of you with their heart and all the love that you deserve as a parent.
"The way I've brought up to is to take critiques and turn them into positives in my game."
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